So life here in the SLC is pretty good. Well I am really hating my job, but everything else is going really well. The time to move is fast approaching as is a little get together at the end of the month. I am soooooo looking forward to that! I can't wait to see all my friends again... I miss you all. After that comes the move... that is going to be crazy. I have no effing idea how I am going to get all my shit across the country, but by god I will. Don't worry though... I will find a way. I kinda have to have all stuff with me. Anyways there is more to talk about... but I can't really talk about it right now. There will come a time that I can. Anyways that's all I have for now. This is just going to have to be a shot blog.

Yeah that dinner was AWESOME!!!

So yeah get back to this after dinner.... what the hell was I thinking? As usual I probably wasn't right? hahaha It's cool though that's just how I roll!

Alright so really I just kept forgeting all my login crap so I just kinda decided that I could neglect my adoring public... yeah right. hahaha Of course there was also the issue of not having a computer that functioned for the longest time. So I finally have a super sweet Mac iBook, thank Cornballer(a.k.a. Erik), and back up and ready to rock and roll.

How am I you ask? I'm magnificent thank you very much. I had a g/f there for about five months, I'm sure some of you may have noted my absence from any kind of xbox play. Been working my tail off, as if that's something new. Pretty much just how I like to do things, and by that I mean I usually don't have anything better to do so I work as much as possible.

So right g/f.... 5 months. It was mostly good times. She's a fun person, but in the end it didn't work out. She didn't want to date anyone she said, and the night she broke up with me she went out with some other guy. Nuff said, I'm not bitter, just disappointed is all. Thought she was a better person than that. Oh wells, you live you learn right?

Well I've gotten back to living my life the way I want to... mostly. With the exception of my crazy ass manager barking in my ear all the time I'm good. I've started reading again which I really missed even though I didn't realize I did. I'm playing with all my friends on xbox live again, and I can't even tell you how much I missed them. Soccer's going pretty well, doing awesome with the new team, sooooooooo glad I got off the old team. I'm actually starting to play at the level I should be playing and that is an amazing feeling let me tell you.

So big news and most people don't know this, but I'm gonna put it out here for all my people. In one and a half months I plan on becoming a resident of the state of Maryland. That's right approximatly 2400 miles from where I currently reside. Crazy right? Why you ask... well there are a few reasons. I'll get to live with my best friend, who I can't even begin to tell you how much I've missed. I've only been able to see him maybe once a year for the past... oh god... 7 years now. How lame is that? Very lame I tell you. So this way I'll get to see him everyday, and I really like the idea of that. Then there's also the fact that I've become so comfortable here that I've become obscenely complacent. I need to get away from here and see if I can get my life jumpstarted. Then there's the matter of this girl. I'll save the next paragraph for her. haha

Right so moving on. So this girl... I'll bet you want to hear about her don't you? Well I honestly can't believe I met her. The most random way too. To those that say playing video games can bring about no good I say this, viva Le Med!!! Yeah that's right, thank you cause I wouldn't have met her otherwise. Her name is Christa, and she is amazing. I feel very lucky to have met her. I don't even know what to say, she's now a big part of my life. I feel like I can be myself around her and she'll love me regardless. It's a really nice feeling to have someone like that in my life. So yeah I also moving there to be closer to her. Most of you who know me know that I'm not a big talker... no big mouth here. At any rate I talk with her for hours on the phone and it's amazing, I've just never felt that comfortable talking with anyone on the phone, it's pretty cool. She's an amazing and strong person, and I'm greatful that I'm lucky enough to have her. Yeah... I can guarantee there will be more about her later.

Alright so it's time for me to start attempting to sleep... I'm sure all of you know how well that's going to go. Suffice it to say it's not going to happen anytime soon. hahaha Anywho more to come I assure you. Life is about to get turned upsidedown for me pretty quick here.... and as nervous as I am I really can't wait. I think good things are about to come.

About Frickin Time!!!

So after a long and protracted battle I have regained access to my blog!! That could be good or bad, I'll just let you decide. There is much to discuss, and all of it involves the great drama that you have come to expect!! haha I'll get started on that right after dinner. After all, who can think on an empty stomach? I know I certainly can't!!!

Why?

Why do I constantly put myself in a position to be disappointed? Could it be because I'm crazy? There's a good possibility of that. Hell let's be honest, there's a better than not chance that it is.

Do I have a great life? Sure do! I get to play soccer all I want, I ski in the winter, I read to my hearts content, I play video games whenever the urge strikes, I'm appreciated for the most part at my places of work, I can't think of a person in this world that hates me, and the people that I associate with on a daily basis are good to me. The point is that I have a great life. Many a person would be envious of what I have been blessed with.

Then why do I feel horribly unfulfilled?

Could it be that I've honestly done very little with my life? I've done some good things for people, some that I've known and many that I haven't, but I've not offered anything great to society in general. How can I change that? What should I do to change that? Better yet, what's the best way to go about changing that?

I've had plenty of time to think about it lately as I no longer have a life. Am I any closer to an answer? Not really, no. My brilliant ideas? Teacher, cop, counselor, politics, military, peace corps, ect. The cream of the crop? Get a college degree in business and make the most money I can. Selfish you say? Wrong I'd reply. That money would most certainly sustain my life, but it would also go to others that need it far more than I ever will. I have this thing I tell people all the time: I will always be able to make more money, but I may not always get the chance to do good.

Is that the reason for my empty feeling inside? I honestly don't know. I just feel disappointed with the things that I'm doing in my life. I love to do the things I do, don't get me wrong, but it sometimes feels that every decision I make is one that leads to more disappointment in the end. Or maybe it's something else entirely. I know one sure fire way to figure it out though. Time to get moving and become someone sucessful. Maybe it'll work, maybe it won't, but I sure mean to find out.

Honesty

What would you do if you were put in a position where you could profit off of someone elses mistake. Something where they would never know? Would you do the good "right" thing, or would you take advantage?

I find myself in this sort of prediciment. I recently ordered some new seats for my car to replace the ones that got water damaged when my car got flooded. Now these things cost a pretty penny at $500 a piece. I ordered two for my car, and all the hardware to mount them. They were shipping from Oregon so I was excited for them to arrive the other day. So monday rolls around and up pulls the UPS man with a couple of large boxes with my sweet seats in them. There are no brackets to mount the seats however. I talk to the guys that sold them to me, and apparently they shipped those separatly, so they'll show up a couple of days later.

So on thursday I get a call from home that a couple of boxes have come. Yes! Those must be my mounting brackets that I've been waiting for. I get home from class and there they are two huge boxes that look way to large for a couple of small pieces of metal. I open the boxes and what do I find? There are my brackets, but there's something else as well....

Two more seats.

Now what do I do? Do I keep these extra seats that they have accidentally shipped me? I am very certain that they will not realize their error. I could turn around and sell them and make my money back. In fact that's what a lot of people I've talked to have said to do. Is that dishonest? Is that a bad thing to do? I guess that all depends on your perspective.

What am I going to do? I'm going to tell the business that I bought them from that they have made a mistake, and that they need to send a shipping label so I can send them back. Why would I do that? Because I'll gain more than money by sending them back. I can always EARN more money, but I'll never be able to get that small part of myself back that I'd be giving up if I took advantage of some guys honest mistake. It's always a good feeling to do the "right" thing. Try it sometime.

To Move or Not to Move?

That's the real question right now.

I've been presented with the opportunity to start a new life in a new place. How do you go about deciding to make a move? I've been in Utah since I was 8, that's a ginormous 18 years. This place is basically all I know. My best friend Chad is in Maryland, and currently the only other single guy I know that I could actually do stuff with. He's bought a house there, and has offered me a room.

I can't say that the offer doesn't appeal to me. In fact it appeals to me now more than it ever would have. I had a pretty bad lonely night last night that damn near drove me to just drink myself stupid so I wouldn't have to think about it. Any of you that knows me, knows that's just not me. I hate that I feel that way, it's a rather empty feeling. This feeling stems from this past weekend, where I was more or less told I'm not welcome at my friends apartment. The last group of friends that I have that are single. Now I've got plenty of friends that are married, basically all of them, but they are always busy either with their wives or other things that married people do.

Now I know that I could just up and start making new friends, but honestly at this point in the game what purpose does that serve? Most people in this state at my age are married. Those that aren't seem to be the type of people that I don't get along with. Meaning that they are lushes or druggies. Why is that? God only knows, I sure know I don't. People around here either seem to be very good, or very bad. It's a rare thing indeed to find someone that is middle of the road like me. I'm not what people 'round here would refer to as a "good" person, but by no means could I be considered bad. Where does that leave me? Screwed, that's where.

So I have to ask myself, do I move? Do I start over in a different place, and hope things will be different in a good way? Or do I stick it out, and make the best out of the hand that I've been delt?

My plea to any that read this? Please do me a favor and post your opinion. I'm really at a loss to what I should do. Maybe I'm just crazy, maybe I'm looking at it all wrong. I suppose there are a lot of maybes. UGH!

I don't do early

Zzzzt Zzzzt Zzzt Zzzt

Yaaaahhhhhn!

"What time is it?"

"Crap, stupid phone."

Slowly gropes around for the phone.

"oh a little early for a text."

7:30 is definitly a little early for me at the moment, as I can't seem to sleep very well. Something to do with kicking myself in the night in my bad foot. Back to the business at hand

"Ya I fell asleep. Sorry, but good morining! Hope your foot starts feeling better" says Abby

"That's right, she's always falling asleep during our conversations. Almost forgot she did it again last night."

Well from there I get an invitation to get some Jamba Juice. I haven't been there in years, but I'm not about to tell a girl no. Even if I am still half asleep, well maybe it's because I'm half asleep. We may never know. Of course I drag my lazy butt out of bed and head out. Nothing like waking up early to spend time with a girl, especially if it's her treat.

Now I'm sitting here and it feels like I've been awake forever, and I've got crap to do 'till work. Not that I'm gonna do much when I get there being that I'm not all to mobile at the moment. Trust me when I say I don't think I could handle another day of just sitting here on my butt. I honestly wanted to kill myself yesterday I was sooooo frickin bored. My advice to you? Don't get hurt, that way you don't have to sit around for hours with nothing to do but ice and elevate.